• The Trigger That Can’t Be Avoided

    I changed my diet to avoid the nitrates, MSG, CHOCOLATE and certain cheese that are triggers for my Hemiplegic Migraine. You know, those things that can keep me in the dark cave for the rest of the day. I have tried to learn new ways to handle stress and I have given myself permission to take naps and rest when needed. Of course, I take my medications just like I am supposed to and I follow my Doctors instructions to the best of my ability. I do absolutely everything I can to avoid the things that make life harder. There is just one trigger that I have not figured out…

  • How Chronic Illness Ruins Plans & Friendships - #schedule #chronicillness #chronicmigraine #plans #cancel #friendship

    One Day I Won’t Cancel

    Your friends invite you for dinner and game night…you are so excited about it. You plan you day around it. You make sure to save your energy, so this time you won’t have to cancel like many times before. It is going to feel so good to get out of the house. It is going to feel amazing to be a part of something. But then it all gets ripped away. It all starts by that bright light in your vision that leads to all the things that stop you in your tracks. Go to an event? That is silly because you can barely undress and get back into your…

  • Mask, chronic illness, migraine,Hemiplegic Migraine

    Taking Off the Mask

    I, like most people with a chronic illness, am really good at hiding how I feel. I wear a mask, a facade. If you ask me how I am doing, I will probably say okay or fine. I want desperately to be normal…to have normal days with normal ups and downs. The mask is there just so I can “feel” like everyone else. I don’t want to be the Debbie Downer that is always talking about her illness. You see, I used to be independent and loved to try new things. If I wanted to go somewhere, I went even if it meant going by myself. I sang in my…

  • The Emergency Room Migraine Stigma - #migraine #chronicmigraine #health #healthcare #stigma

    I Am Not a Drug Seeker

    Do you want to know what it is like to be treated like a drug seeker? Go to the ER and tell them you have a migraine. Often times you are talked down too, disrespected, made to feel like you are a bother to everyone around you. They often give you strong narcotics in an IV and send you on your way because they think they have given you what you want. But those narcotics give you re-bound headaches so you are caught in a vicious cycle. The type Of Migraine that I have is rare. Approximately 20,000 in the US have this type of Migraine. What I have is…

  • Hard week, sick, migraine, medication

    Hard Week and Frustration

    Honestly, this has been a hard week. I had a reaction to one of my medications. It just so happens to be the one that keeps the fluid pressure from building up around my brain. My right eye was swollen, my kidneys were not functioning well and I had absolutely no appetite at all! So My Doctor had me go off the medication immediately instead of his normal taper off schedule. Let me just tell you that as the week has progressed it has just been bad. Vision issues, inability to talk. Paralysis (all part of the aura) has been horrendous! The headaches that have followed have not really been eased…

  • It is time to stop talking and start doing! It is time to stop allowing my limitations to be a reason to stop. Life is too short to stop!

    Life is too Short

    This past November my best friend passed away after a long fight with breast cancer. The thing is that for all but her last 2 weeks you wouldn’t have known she was sick. She really did live her life on her on terms and fought the good fight. Her passing really threw me off kilter. Yes, she had stage 4 breast cancer for 3 years but she wasn’t sick the majority of that time. She came home with Hospice on a Wednesday and was gone by Friday. I physically pushed myself to be there…to do everything I could to keep the room calm and to let her husband hold her…

  • Sickness, health, marriage, chronic illness

    In Sickness and in Health

    Let’s think about those words for just a minute. “In Sickness and in Health “, they were probably the easiest words to say. Sort of stuck in between “for richer or poorer” and “Til death do us part”. They seem like the easiest of the three. Especially since we live in a society where nothing bad is ever going to happen. But now let’s think about the reality of those words. “In sickness and in Health” means that diagnosis that was going to be nothing turns out to be the worst news ever. Did your spouse really mean those words that seemed so insignificant at the time? Is your spouse…